When a "Good News" Diagnosis Means "Bad News" for the Relationship, Pt. I

 We call ADHD a "good news" diagnosis. That's because it offers not only a long-elusive rational explanation for vexing behavior but also effective treatment strategies.  So, why does diagnosis (and sometimes even treatment) mean "bad news" for some relationships? 






     The reasons run the gamut, as complex as the individuals involved and their history together. To explore this topic a

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When ADHD is All in the Family

What happens when it's not just "you or me" who has ADHD but you, me, and a few of the children? (And maybe the dog, too!)

This month's post is written by Cynthia Hammer, MSW, an advocate who has long and admirably served the ADHD community in various capacities. She is currently an AD/HD coach in the Seattle area as well an avid bicyclist and mother of three. As a longtime fan of her work

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Out With The Old, In With The....Wait, Do You Really Need New Clutter?

There Janet was, peacefully washing dishes one evening, when suddenly a loud thumping and banging sounded from the front walkway. The clamor continued through the front door and down the hall. Alarmed, she peeked around the corner with some trepidation.


The source of all the ruckus? Her 6-foot-3 husband Ralph, angrily wrestling the giant outdoor garbage-can-on-wheels through the narrow

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Partners in Life, Partners in ADHD Awareness

You share a life together – maybe even a bed, a checking account, and human offspring, too. It might sound surprising (especially to some less-than-savvy physicians and therapists), but ADHD evaluation and treatment outcome also typically benefits from a shared "team" approach. Let's examine the reasons why.

Elaine finally decided to seek professional help for her long-ago diagnosed ADHD. But

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The "Gifts of ADHD": Transforming Humiliation into Humility

A big obstacle faced by couples dealing with ADHD is denial -- that is, either partner refuses to concede that ADHD exists, that it is causing challenges, or that effective strategies truly exist.



The reasons for denial around ADHD are myriad and complex. For some who arrive at the diagnosis in adulthood, though, it's simple: ADHD feels like one more negative label, right down there with

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Is It "Miscommunication" -- or Could It Be Adult ADHD?

With a warm smile and a kiss, Diane welcomed fiancé George at her front door and then noticed fresh mud on his shoes. In a pleasant tone of voice, she asked, him to please leave his boots on the stairs? Puzzled, he said, "Your suits stare? Huh? What on earth are you talking about?" Despite her clarification, George remained convinced that Diane had said exactly that. Moreover, she'd said it

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ADHD and Sex: No Shame, No Blame

"Gina, sex is difficult for people with ADHD; it's tough to stay focused!" says a female Facebook friend, responding to my query on this topic.

     What, you say, ADHD affects sex? Who knew? Yes, it's one of those areas, like sleep, where we often fail to connect the dots to ADHD symptoms.  In fact, I open the chapter on sex in my book, Is It You, Me, or  Adult A.D.D.?. with this quote:

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