Pt. 2: When a "Good News" Diagnosis Means Bad News for the Relationship

Years ago, when my husband first agreed to be evaluated for ADHD, he did it on one condition: that I be evaluated for it, too.  Whether he simply disliked being singled out or truly thought me ADHD'ish remains lost in the mists of time and perhaps distorted perception. 


      My guess: He simply wasn't connecting the dots between his actions and my reactions, which from his

Read More

When a "Good News" Diagnosis Means "Bad News" for the Relationship, Pt. I

 We call ADHD a "good news" diagnosis. That's because it offers not only a long-elusive rational explanation for vexing behavior but also effective treatment strategies.  So, why does diagnosis (and sometimes even treatment) mean "bad news" for some relationships? 






     The reasons run the gamut, as complex as the individuals involved and their history together. To explore this topic a

Read More

The "Gifts of ADHD": Transforming Humiliation into Humility

A big obstacle faced by couples dealing with ADHD is denial -- that is, either partner refuses to concede that ADHD exists, that it is causing challenges, or that effective strategies truly exist.



The reasons for denial around ADHD are myriad and complex. For some who arrive at the diagnosis in adulthood, though, it's simple: ADHD feels like one more negative label, right down there with

Read More